The Battle For Men’s Souls

Sayde Scarlett
3 min readSep 26, 2022

--

© GoodIdeas / Shutterstock

Former kickboxer Andrew Tate has recently been banned off multiple social media platforms for creating violent, misogynistic content. His Tiktok videos contained troubling assertions such as that rape victims are to blame for their own assaults and that women are the property of men alongside discussions about beating and choking women, how to destroy their belongings and stop them from going out. His content has pushed the boundaries of even the most ardent proponents of free speech, as he appears to be inciting his many followers to violence rather than merely fill their heads with misogynistic artifice. Far from being a cultural anomaly, however, Tate is just the latest and most aggressive ‘manosphere’ personality who uses his platform to target other men. It’s worth exploring why Tate and his content has such a large appeal to young men.

One of the most obvious and frequently cited areas of contention is widespread dissatisfaction with the dating market. Online forums full of ‘Incels’ (involuntary celibates) bombast the aspects of contemporary culture they blame for their lack of success in finding sexual partners. They contend that feminism and dating apps facilitate ‘hypergamy’, with the most successful men being awarded the vast majority of female attention whilst they, for superficial reasons such as their looks, height, job etc., are always rejected. Whilst I wholeheartedly agree that dating apps are unpleasant, and they don’t work for many people — I gave up using them years ago — there are obvious problems with their theories.

Despite their prevalence, dating apps are not the only possible way to find a partner, and Incels also tend to overestimate how much fun women are having on them. Most women I know hate dating apps too and have found little success on them but aren’t turning to extreme content as a result. Whether their grievances are real or imagined, there is a prevailing sense of hopelessness around many young men. As a result, they are being taken to the cleaners by grifters like Andrew Tate whose ‘Hustlers University’ costs $49 per month. Other online courses promising to turn men into ‘Alpha Males’ run as high as $1430 for eight sessions. One Twitter account (with a fake profile picture) and its accompanying blog, promises to teach older men how to simultaneously date numerous younger ‘sugar babies’ via a manual that costs $499.

There is a contradiction running through the ‘manosphere’, however, as despite the tendency of those within it to romanticise the long-gone, good ol’ days of the traditional family, this does not seem to be the goal for most of the followers of someone like Andrew Tate. What is most striking to me is those viewing this content have an overwhelming sense of entitlement to access to women, and a deep desire for multiple sexual partners. In a increasingly secular society, men’s issue influencers have entered the gap where religious values have receded. Without religious voices telling young men they should pursue monogamous marriage, treat other human beings in a way that reflects they are created in the image and likeness of God, and that they are not entitled to sex without the sacrament of marriage — they are being led to believe that an ‘alpha male’ is just a man who is rich and fornicates with as many women as possible. They then find themselves in a deeper pit when they can’t attain this cartoonish ideal.

Many failures have led to the state young men find themselves in now. Among them are the failure to instil in men the social skills that turn them into appealing partners, the failure to teach men how to handle rejection with grace and maturity, the failure to assert monogamous marriage as an attainable ideal, the failure to teach men they are not entitled to anyone, and the failure to assert a Christlike, or even a sexually continent, model for manhood. In some dark corners of the ‘manosphere’, Christ is derided as pathetic figure who let himself be sacrificed instead of fighting back against his capturers. But I can guarantee you that no woman I know, Christian or otherwise, would choose a man who models himself on Andrew Tate over a man who models himself on Jesus Christ.

Thank you for reading — I hope you found my thoughts interesting. You can find links to my other work here: https://linktr.ee/sayde.scarlett

--

--

Sayde Scarlett
Sayde Scarlett

Written by Sayde Scarlett

Author and poet by day; artist by night. Loves to tell stories and create art; loves to talk about stories and creating art.

No responses yet